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C2 Sample Essay 39 (School or family shapes one's personality)

In the minds of ESL exam candidates, e ssay writing is one of the most daunting tasks they are required to complete, regardless of the level of the exam, the administering body or the ease with which they themselves use the language. The same applies to students who are asked to write an essay by their teachers at school.  In the previous sample essays posted on the blog, the main point I stress is the need to become acquainted with this form of writing (as opposed to writing a letter, review or report, for instance), to get a feel of what authorial voice is and how to organize and progressively express the arguments you wish to make in a coherent manner.  Unfortunately, the best way to prepare for exam writing or learn how to write good essays for school is to read as many essays from as many sources as possible, then write as

Essay Writing: The Main Body - The Topic Sentence

This is the third article in my essay-writing series which will clarify issues relating to the main body of an essay. In the two previous articles, I discussed the overall organization of an essay and how an introductory paragraph should be set down.

I'd like to clarify once again that these articles can be useful to anyone who has to compose an essay but have mainly been aimed at giving test-takers a practical guide as to how they can manage to successfully complete the Writing Section of an EFL / ESL examination and so are in no way the definitive answer to all essay organization queries. Candidates who are studying to take the IELTS, MSU-CELC or CELP, ECPE, ECCE, ESB, LRN, TOEFL, CPE, FCE (First for Schools), PTE and need to write an essay in approximately half an hour can use the layout I propose to quickly structure their answer and not waste time having to come up with something more inventive.

Having said that, I must stress that being more creative will undoubtedly earn you a higher score, but if you know that you are weak in writing, it's better to venture on the safe side and go with a more basic and rigid structure to your essay that you feel safe navigating in and can apply in most essay-writing situations than let your mind run over options and waste precious minutes.

 So, we dealt with the first paragraph of an essay (the introduction) and said we could split that up into three parts / three sentences. Now let's see how we can organize the main body of our essay.

Our introduction, if you recall, was shaped like an upside-down triangle because we went from the very general to the very specific. Unlike an introduction, a main body paragraph gives chunks of information which are all equally important, so it can be represented as a nice solid square. Since English exams usually ask candidates to write from between 180 and 300 words depending on the level of the examination, you should end up having 2 to 4 'squares' or paragraphs as part of the essay's main body.

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As you can see from the image above, a main body paragraph could be divided into three parts, which I'll  discuss in turn. Sometimes, the last part (the concluding sentence) is omitted if the writer feels it's unnecessary. Note how the lengthiest section of the paragraph includes supporting sentences and that the first and last parts are much shorter.


The Topic Sentence

 First off, always keep in mind the following equation: 

one paragraph = one key idea 

You cannot paste a number of different ideas together in one paragraph without them all being in some way related to a central idea which you present in the first sentence of the paragraph, i.e. in the topic sentence. If you do, you end up having an array of haphazard statements with no logic weaving them together which will confuse readers.

This is a paragraph's most important sentence for your reader because it gives them a clear idea what it is you intend to discuss in the paragraph. The clearer the sentence, the better it is for your reader to know exactly how you tackle the issue you're dealing with. Without a topic sentence, the reader has no map to guide him or her through the workings of your mind, so make sure you know precisely what it is that you're arguing before starting to argue it.

 Now, the type of essay you'll be asked to write will greatly influence what topics each of your paragraphs in the main body will discuss. For instance, if the exam rubric requires you see both the positive and negative aspects of an issue, the main body paragraphs will be organized according to the number of advantages and disadvantages you come up with before you start writing your essay. One paragraph might deal with all the advantages while another one with all the disadvantages (this usually happens in a B2-level English examination) or you might have 3 separate paragraphs exposing different advantages and two further ones dealing with disadvantages (which might be the case for C2-level English exams). 

 If the rubric asks for your opinion, you might have one or more main body paragraphs discuss arguments that support the side of the argument you are in favor of, while another one outlines the argument(s) the other side claims. 

 If the rubric asks you to discuss a problem and find solutions, there are different ways to embark on a discussion that will be explained in greater depth once I publish posts on different essay types later on in this series. 

 For now, however, let's look at some examples of topic sentences:
  • On the one hand, co-ed schools present a number of benefits.
    • In a paragraph beginning with this topic sentence, the reader expects to find a number of advantages co-ed schools have.

  • Second of all, an effective means of reducing greenhouse gas emissions is limiting the number of products you buy.
    • The first 3 words tell you that this is the second paragraph that deals with ways of reducing greenhouse gas emissions. The sentences that follow this topic sentence will only discuss how buying fewer products is an effective means of reducing such emissions.
 
  • In contrast to this, opponents of this view maintain that it is much more likely for crime rates to soar if capital punishment is abolished.
    • This sentence prepares the reader by first telling them that the discussion has now changed and that it will focus on the argument of those who are against the abolition of capital punishment, namely on the fact that the crime rate will increase.
 
  • Two major drawbacks of using public transportation have to do with convenience and time. 
    • This topic sentence states that the paragraph will discuss the disadvantages in using public transport regarding convenience and time.
 
Note how the first topic sentence in this list of examples is much more general than the three that follow it. Your goal is to make the topic sentence as precise as possible so that your reader knows more or less what to expect as they go on to read the sentences within that paragraph. In order to this, make sure you have thought carefully and jotted down notes which you quickly organize before starting to write the actual essay. 

Unfortunately, many students nowadays write without brainstorming for about 5 minutes beforehand. Essays written without planning are much more difficult to digest because readers find it necessary to have to re-read the essay two or three times in order to understand the train of thought behind the discussion of an issue.To resolve this, simply write a very specific topic sentence and speak only about what is mentioned in it.  

In addition to keeping things clear, you minimize the risk of going off topic. After you finish writing a paragraph, check all the sentences that are included against your topic sentence to see that they directly refer to what is stated in it. If you mentioned in the topic sentence that buying fewer products reduces greenhouse gas emissions but have included a sentence within that paragraph that mentions factories dumping fewer toxic chemicals in rivers, lakes and seas, then you have detached yourself from the subject of that paragraph as toxic waste, although related to pollution, isn't a direct source of greenhouse gases that trap heat and make our planet warmer.

All in all, remember to:
  • write down ideas in note form before starting to write your essay
  • organize your notes quickly into paragraphs
  • write a clear and precise topic sentence for each of the main body paragraphs
  • check a paragraph's sentences against its topic sentence and 
    • leave out any that aren't directly related to it
    • tie any that are indirectly related to it in a more direct way so that readers see why that sentence has been included in the paragraph 

The next article will deal with the different types of supporting sentences you can include within a main body paragraph.



Click on the following links for more posts concerning essay writing:

 1) The Overall Organization of an Essay

2) The Introductory Paragraph

3) The Main Body - Supporting Sentences 

4) The Main Body - Concluding Sentence


Read a variety of sample essays by clicking on the image below

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Looking for help with the oral exam? Click the image for tips and topics to improve your speaking skills. 


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